How the Tide has Turned

A lot has happened. Let's just talk about the last few days to start.

Tonight in Tampa I had the privledge of swimming in the pool near the venue. It's a really wonderful place, the venue I mean. It's in St. Petersburg and it's on the water. Next to it, is a pool and waterslides. I saw people playing in there after the show and I ran around the building and found out it was a private party that Angels and Airwaves had booked. I know their merch guys and I asked if it was a closed party. They said yes, but not for me. I dived off the diving board and slide down the slides many times. It was awesome. Tom Delong (sp?) was playing with his kid or kids and was looking really daddyish. It was awesome. Thanks, Tom.

During the day at the Tampa venue the FBR staff came out to hang out. I love them a lot. They are all nice kids. One in particular is Caleb. He's popular I guess. He's also super fun. I wish I lived in this area so we could party. In fact, I wish I could live near all my friends so I could party all the time.

It has been my dream to have my own stage on the tour. I mean, everyone wants the glory of having something that's their own, but when it comes to me you can shove that glory up your ass. I want my own stage so the party doesn't stop. Let me break it down for you: My stage would be killer as f*ck. It would have only really fun bands and I would have like a 400 person pillow fight. Amazing right? So here's what I did as a joke: I made 100 one page flyers that said I needed volunteers for the METAL PARTY STAGE. Like a sound guy, merchies, and other tech people. I attached it below.

To my surprise, a few people were really into it, and actually wanted to volunteer. Now, don't get me wrong, I do have connections. I like to consider myself hooked-up (whatever that means); however, how the fuck could I get GWAR? They are expensive and you can't have just any stage for them. It has to be special. They need power and water hoses. What I'm trying to say is that if you saw my flyer, and believed it was happening you're an idiot. On the other hand, thank you for believing in me.

As the day went on in Orlando, production called me. They wanted to talk about this stage. I saw scared about it. When I got there I explained that it's a joke and they were like, "okay, cool." Some thought it was funny, others did not. Hopefully Kevin will steal my party stage idea and bring it to life.

The fourth of July was legendary. We had the day off in Austin, TX, where the Bronx had a joint show at Emo's with the Pink Spiders, and ANDREW W.K! Long story short, the Bronx were amazing with both their punk, and mariachi sets. For ANDREW, I whipped out the mankini and wrestler mask again. He was like, "Hey, you're from new york!" I was like, "Andrew, you are my favorite singer!" It was too amazing. I lost it. The next day's show was shitty, but good. Texas is the man.

There's a member of Against Me who gives me funny looks. I'm not sure which one he is. He's not the drummer or the bass player. He is a smaller, heavy set guy with a small beard. He seems nice, and his band is really awesome. You see, working for Fueled By Ramen means you hang out with a lot of kids, which can be frowned upon when you're on a tour with bands that are punk-as-fuck. I mean, AM is not that punk-as-fuck, but they come from that old school crew of punks that think what I do is not punk, when being punk means not giving a shit and doing what you want, which is what I do. Whatever: So he sees me wearing like nothing with young kids around, and he gives me these looks as if I was Michael Jackson or someone who's a sexual predator. In Orlando I was promoting outside my tent and he walked by. I didn't mean to try to promote/yell at him--I thought he was a patron, but I did and he just shook his head negatively. It is a bum out a little, but you cannot please them all. In the words of Bob Wiley, "people are like phone booths, sometimes they are just out of order. All you can do is keep trying."

We had a day off in New Orleans. I have not been there since 2003 when I won 60 dollars in nickels with Ryan's (Ernie Ball) money. You could see water damage and such. It was kind of startling. Whatever: We woke up to find a Mexican taco truck right outside the bus. My Torta was amazing. I finally had Mexican Coca-Cola in a bottle--it's sweeter than any kiss I've ever had with a woman.  We showered and rolled into NOLA. We took a cab from where we were to where we thought a Bank Of America was. Apparently, BOA never moved back into their location after Katrina. We were then poised with staying in one of the shaddiest cities in the world with a backpack filled with $10,000. Scary, right? We decided to go after walking and eating instead of going to the Norma Jean show at the HOB there. We hung out by the bus, and watched the Bronx get really shit faced. On this night, the Bronx really accepted us in their home and in their lives. They seem to understand us as people and how we do our thing during the day. It's hard being a band that's not use to pushing themselves at kids and asking for a handout, and in all respects they still don't do that. They don't tell kids to jump or do things while they are playing, and they don't beg kids to buy their CDs like all the bands out here. They have a level of respect in themselves, which I appreciate; however, this tour, to most bands, is about hustling and making dough. It's a matter of numbers. If you don't sell a grand a day in merch, and you have a bus, you're not breaking even. They call us the "queens" I guess because Chad and I come off as gay dudes to make money. At first they thought it was weird, and they probably still do, but they see how it works. We entertain people and they dig it. Whatever: I love that band too much.

The day off in Alabama kind of sucked. There was nothing to do and I ate two times at Taco Bell. Since then my shit has been pretty liquidy.

On our day off in New Mexico I bought Mario Kart for Wii and three wheels for it. We've unlocked just about every course, car, and character. I've been trying to get more people on the bus to play it with me. That's going okay. I just want to play games all the time and hang out. The Bronx played a bit, but video games are not their thing.

I wanted to grind on Jeffery Star at the Warped After Party in Denver. It would have been a riot.

Paramore were fantastic when they were here on the tour. Aaron their merch guy is a sweetheart I hope to talk to him soon.

Tour is almost half over and that's not cool.